Monday, November 23, 2009

Mmm.. Monday.

Four day fast starts today. It'll pretty much mean that I'll just lose what I gained over the weekend. I'm sure it's pounds, multiple. I've just had a hearty breakfast, and might I say really large, breakfast, of porridge and raisins and three slices of brown bread toast. My stomach has expanded A LOT.

But I'm back in the game. Haven't slept all night. Not since Saturday night. It's now six thirty. At seven thirty I'm gonna get ready and walk to college. Then I'll walk into town to go to some galleries. Then walk back home. And back to college to do some writing. Yes I will write. All this food has fuelled me and I'm ready to get back to writing reviews, hopefully get something submitted and published. It's been too damn long. And I don't care what's in my stomach, or rather I'm ignoring that horrible, horrible weight I can feel resting there if it means I can succeed in getting things done today. I do care. But it's temporary.

Then it's just going to be sheer momentum for the week. Here's hoping all that walking will work breakfast off. This will be the week. Galleries today. Writing and research tomorrow. Meeting with ex on Wed. Two exhibition openings on Thurs followed by a gig. After my counsellor appointment. Then Friday I crash. Because I'm sure it's a possibility. Sat is the film screening. Sun is home so I can go to my dentist appointment on Mon and inspect exactly how my starvation has ravaged my body. Well at least I ate for a few days so that might slow things down. No wait, two days. But fuck, it was so so much it may as well as been a week binge. Haven't purged all weekend though.

I've never felt the need to write up details of my personal life on here before. And I don't expect I will much. But this morning I'm buzzing. Must not weigh until Thursday. Otherwise I'll just see my gain and be crushed. No No No.

I will go upstairs and get dressed. And I will NOT buckle to the desire to wear baggy clothes to cover my bloated stomach. What's the worst eh? I'm back to seven stone? Seven stone is my barrier weight. It allows for little mishaps like this weekend. Over that and I'd absolutely die. Back down to 93 on Thurs and I'd be the happiest girl alive.

And I don't care about the torrential rain and wind, I'll walk, and walk. I like it that way. Anyone for Mondays?

1 comment:

  1. I hate Mondays. ._.
    I was supposed to get the bus home on Friday, but walked. Same today, but it's raining. Feck that. The drowned-rat look doesn't work for me. xD

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